The Men Who Stare at Goats - Softcover

Ronson's finely written book strikes a perfect balance between curiosity, incredulity, and humor. His characters are each more bizarre than the last, and Ronson does a wonderful job of depicting the colorful quirks they reveal in their often-comical meetings. Through a charming guile, he manages to elicit many strange and amazing revelations. Ronson meets a general who is frustrated in his frequent attempts to walk through walls. One source says the U.S. military has deployed psychic assassins to the Middle East to hunt down Al Qaeda suspects. Entertaining and disturbing. --Alex Roslin

1. Goat/Hamster Thought-Death Experiments.

Description: Special Forces soldiers stare, heart of goat/hamster eventually explodes.

Success Rate: One dead goat, one dead hamster (experiments conducted inside 'Goat Lab' at Fort Bragg, North Carolina).

Operational Use: Military Intelligence currently considering staring at detainees at Abu Ghraib (not to kill them, just to freak them out).

2. Bee-Attracting Theremone.

Description: Special theremone to be sprayed on the enemy before bees are released to attack them.

Success Rate: Still in proposal stage.

Operational Use: Enemies will get stung.

3. Walking Through Walls.

Description: Soldier learns to walk through wall. Secret experiments conducted at US Army Intelligence headquarters, Arlington, Virginia.

Success Rate: None. Soldiers kept bumping their noses.

Operational Use: Who would want to screw with an army that could do that?

4. Blasting the enemy with the theme tune to Barney The Purple Dinosaur

Description: Detainee placed inside steel shipping container. Barney song is repeatedly blasted.

Success Rate: Hard to quantify.

Operational Use: This interrogation technique is designed to hit detainee on a "psycho-spiritual dimension". Currently being deployed in Iraq.