About the Author:
Carol Kent is the bestselling author of When I Lay My Isaac Down and A New Kind of Normal. Carol is an expert on public speaking, writing, and on encouraging people to hold on to hope when life's circumstances turn out differently from their dreams. She speaks internationally on the subjects of her books. With vulnerable openness, restored joy, and a sense of humor, Carol helps people to find God's 'grace places' in the middle of challenging circumstances. SPANISH BIO: Carol Kent es un popular orador internacional publico mas conocido por ser dinamico, divertido, alentador, y biblicas. Es un show de radio ex co-anfitrion y con frecuencia ha sido invitado en Focus on the Family y ponente en tiempo de espera para los eventos de la Mujer y Patrimonio ambito Guardianes. Ella ha hablado en el Encuentro de Alabanza y creyentes en el Congreso la vision de Nueva Inglaterra. Tambien es un orador frecuente en las mujeres de los acontecimientos virtud de todo el pais.
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Kisses of Sunshine for Moms Copyright 2005 by Speak Up, Inc., and Ellie Kay Requests for information should be addressed to: Zondervan, Grand Rapids, Michigan 49530 Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data Kisses of sunshine for moms / Carol Kent, general editor; [contributors], Ellie Kay. p. cm. Includes bibliographical references. ISBN-10: 0-310-24765-9 ISBN-13: 978-0-310-24765-4 1. Mothers---Religious life. 2. Mothers---Anecdotes. 3. Christian life--- Meditations. I. Kent, Carol, 1947-- II. Kay, Ellie. BV4529.18.K57 2004 242'.6431---dc22 2004021736 This edition printed on acid-free paper. All Scripture quotations, unless otherwise indicated, are taken from the Holy Bible: New International Version. NIV. Copyright 1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society. Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved. The website addresses recommended are offered as a resource to you. These websites are not intended in any way to be or imply an endorsement on the part of Zondervan, nor do we vouch for their content for the life of this book. All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means---electronic, mechanical, photocopy, recording, or any other---except for brief quotations in printed reviews, without the prior permission of the publisher. Published in association with the literary agency of Alive Communications, Inc., 7680 Goddard Street, Suite 200, Colorado Springs, CO 80920. Interior design by Tracey Walker Printed in the United States of America 05 06 07 08 09 10 11 12 /DCI/ 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1 a drug-free experience Ellie Kay Zig Ziglar says he is such an optimist he would go after Moby Dick in a rowboat and take the tartar sauce with him. James S. Hewett I've always been a forward thinker---but sometimes that gets me into trouble. When I was in my early twenties, I became interested in what I thought would be the next stage in my life: having babies. I attended a small-town church in Texas where several families were into natural home births. I'd sit for hours listening to moms tell me why having babies at home was the very best option for Christians. I believed every word. A friend also listened intently and decided to have her first birth at home, with a midwife and no drugs. About the time my friend 'Ginger' got to the transition phase of labor, that final stage before a mom begins to push, her breathing techniques were not blocking the pain. She looked at her husband, 'George,' and said, 'I can't believe this hurts so bad---I don't deserve this pain!' To which her godly Christian husband replied, 'You're right, you don't deserve this . . . ' Then he made a horrible, terrible, no good, very bad mistake. He added an ill-timed biblical principle: '. . . what you really deserve is death.' To which his Christian wife replied: 'I'll show you death!' When the childbirth season finally arrived for me, I read all the home-birth books, went to Lamaze training, and listened to tapes such as 'Supernatural Childbirth.' I even considered birthing at home. But by the time the baby was due, another one of the naturalists in our church had almost lost a baby by birthing in her home, an hour from the nearest hospital. So I compromised. I decided to be the first mom to deliver a baby in the natural childbirth room in our two-year-old regional hospital. It seemed to be all or nothing in our town: you either used the labor and delivery room or you birthed at home. No one had tried the combination room yet. The student nurses, who were on their OB rotation, were hoping I'd deliver on their shift so they could witness this trivial bit of hospital history. They bustled around the hallway, giving each other an update on my progress. Their experienced supervisor, Nurse Betty, felt my stomach and announced: 'I've guessed the weight on a hundred babies, and I've been within six ounces of their actual weight. I'm guessing this will be a good-sized baby of about eight pounds, six ounces.' Not only was I destined to make hospital history with this birth, I was going to break Nurse Betty's weight-guessing record. While I was in labor I concentrated on breathing techniques, and they really worked for me. It was hard, but breathing helped displace the pain---for the most part. However, the closer I got to delivery, the easier it was to get distracted and lose focus. Once, when the door opened, I saw six faces stacked up like a totem pole, all peering in to catch a glimpse of the lady who didn't do drugs. By this time, I felt like a 'watched pot' that wasn't boiling soon enough and was not in the mood to be a 'class project.' I was also worried about something else. Even though it wasn't my nature to use profanity, I was deathly afraid I would get into transition and then just go crazy and cuss out the pastor's wife who was visiting me in labor. Tip: if you're planning on visiting a woman in your congregation who is in labor, don't count anything she has to say (especially in transition) against her. After only six hours of labor, I delivered an eleven-pound, twenty-four-inch boy. The nurses dubbed him 'Baby Huey.' All this without drugs or cursing. I know, it's a miracle! It was such a great experience that I was destined to repeat it four more times. Each was in a natural birthing room and was done without drugs. I didn't go into the natural childbirth experience with the same attitude as the naturalists from my small-town church. No, I didn't say that birthing a baby without drugs was somehow related to my spirituality. I just decided to try it, and it worked for me. I have scads of friends who take an epidural as soon as they arrive in the hospital. That works for them. They're great moms and good Christians---and they use drugs. I think most women who have borne children enjoy sharing their childbirth stories---good and bad. Just have any firsttime pregnant mom walk into a meeting of Mothers of Preschoolers and ask, 'Hey, does anyone want to tell me what it's like to have a baby?' She will be besieged with stories such as: 'I was in labor twenty-eight hours, pushed for ten hours, and ended up having a C-section.' Or: 'I thought I was gonna die. I mean, I thought I was going out of my mind it hurt so bad. I just knew I was gonna die.' Or: 'I screamed the entire time. I just yelled and yelled and yelled and then I yelled some more.' I'm so grateful I was blessed with good experiences and have encouraging stories to tell. It worked a particular way for me just because it did---not because I was good. Not because I had an extraordinary amount of faith. Not because I'm a naturalist and God honors naturalists. Not any of those reasons. And if you're a tad jealous about my 'good story,' then just read my 'bad story' in chapter 3, and you'll feel much better. The next time you're talking to a woman who is expecting her first child, think twice about how you tell your 'red badge of courage' birth story. Choose your words carefully and try to accentuate the positive. After all, only God knows how a particular labor and delivery will progress and turn out. If you happen to have a harrowing story that could upset or frighten a new mom-to-be, it's a good idea to ask whether or not the woman is really interested in hearing your story. It's important to remember that God cares deeply for every mom in the labor of birth and the labor of life. A word aptly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver. Proverbs 25:11
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